Mother’s Day 2012 started with an announcement to our families, a baby was on the way. We had known for a few weeks but wanted to make sure the first tests and scans came back healthy before announcing to our families. Nine months later that same little baby made me a mother. Two years later I was made a mother again. My life has never been the same since. These last five years have flown by, milestone after milestone creeping up on me as the days passed. I have grown as a person and learned more than I thought ever possible.
I’ve learned that mom friends are at times more valuable than gold. Questions and concerns, funny stories and frustrations. There is no one in the world more interested and willing to help than another mom. I remember one afternoon swaying with Macie on the patio as she was having a colicky episode, my neighbor came over and took took her from my arms. Not only was it a nice break for my arms but it felt nice being seen, having someone understand the frustration and exhaustion I was feeling in that moment. This is one example, I have hundreds. Find your tribe and love them hard.
I’ve learned that no matter how you parent or what decisions you make, there will always be someone there to criticize you. Breastfeeding or formula, cloth or disposable diapers, working or stay-at-home mom. All of these will be debated until the end of time. Do what is best for your family and ignore all of the rest. No one knows your family better than you.
I’ve learned that effort has to be made for your marriage. Being a parent and a wife is hard. Countering the negative effects that a busy life brings us is imperative to a healthy relationship. My husband and I make conscious effort all of the time to ensure our relationship is not being neglected. We aren’t perfect but when one of us feels the strain increasing we make immediate plans for lunch or a date night or something to get us back to good.
I’ve learned that children are amazing. From seeing them roll over the first time to writing their name, the change and development within in a child’s early years never ceases to amaze me. Appreciate it and treasure the small moments, take a lot of pictures (mamarazzi anyone?!) Time Hop is my best friend and worst enemy every morning “OMG so cute?!” and also “OMG where’s my baby gone to?!”
Lastly I’ve learned that I’m still here. While I’m in a different stage of life and I am playing a new role in this life as mother I am still here. I am still the girl that loves a glass of wine while sitting outside listening to music. I am still the girl that loves reading. I’m still that creative monster that needs to be doing something artsy whether it be photography, painting, vinyl, or sewing. We are still our old selves under the yoga pants and top knots. We are still here and we still need to be nourished. Don’t neglect what you need as a person. The best moms are the ones that take care of themselves as well as their children.
This Mother’s Day I hope you enjoy your family. I hope you have breakfast in bed (but only if the kitchen is cleaned for you). I hope you get a little time to yourself. Happy Mother’s Day Mama! You’re doing great.