::Me:: What I've Learned...About Myself

I’m 34. It’s so weird to see that number because I don’t feel how I thought 34 would feel, in reality I don’t know what 34 should feel like. So much about life is different from what we expect it to be.

Time flies by. I know that is such a common saying but everyone says it because it’s so true!

I recently found myself referring to someone that is 26 as “about my age”. That’s not true obviously. Someone that is 26 is eight years younger than me but that’s honestly what it feels like. However looking back it does make sense that I’m 34. I’ve been out of college and in the working world for over ten years. I have been a mom for four years. I have been with my husband for nineteen years and we’ve been married for ten of those years. Not to mention the countless life lessons I’ve learned about the world and also about myself.

I am a procrastinator. I never really gave myself that label before but over time I realize that I push everything down to the wire. If there is no deadline, I accomplish most of my goals eventually but if there is a deadline, I’m usually working right up to that moment, maybe a few hours before. My work day usually begins with catching up on Facebook and the news rather than knocking out my list and using any free time at the end of the day to catch-up.

I am introverted. I’m friendly, chatty even at times but for the most part I want to keep to my world (my friends, my family, my turf). I make plans with good intentions but usually have thoughts to cancel. If I don’t cancel, I usually do have fun but sometimes in the moments leading up to it, I have second thoughts and regret committing.

I love Pinot Noir and I love knowing which wines I love. I also love that I know which wines I like best with which foods.

I value friends but I’ve learned I can break-up with a friend if it’s in the best interest of both of us and that’s ok. Friendships are needed in those moments you just need a reprieve; whether it be a break from work, kids, or real life, friends are there. Friendships are easy and natural and for the friendships that are not these things, it’s ok if they are no more. Life is too short; time and energy too limited to be expended on friendships that aren’t enjoyable.

I love Target, like LOVE. I love that I can redecorate my patio while picking up wipes and yogurt. I love that I live three miles from one. I love that I can peruse the aisles with a Starbucks tea and a cake pop. I love that my girls love Target as much as I do. ::keep up the good work Target::

I find peace in a good book and I’ve learned that a bath can heal almost anything.

I value people. I will not put others down to make myself look better and I will not step on someone to get higher. I put family above work at all times. I know I only get 18 or so years with my girls and no job or promotion is worth missing out on any moment with them.

I do not have a poker face. I wear my thoughts and emotions and it’s felt in my demeanor. I do not play games and I am genuine.

I am capable of more love than I could have ever fathomed 15 years ago. I love my husband more every day. I love my girls each so much. I love my family and my friends. I love this life I have built with them.

I am so blessed to have all I do. Who knows where I’ll be in another ten years but based on the last ten, I look forward to seeing it.